Paint The Black

Baseball and Beyond

Lying Joe’s Medicine Show

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Al Yankzeera’s   Assistant GM, Jean Bloody Mary Afterman apparently had settled all  family business with her ingenious plan to send  ARod on his Tessio ride in   style..

With a mini one night  farewell tour, a gig mentoring all of the future Mickey Mantle and Derek Jeter’s in the system, and every last penny of his $27M safe from Brillo Levine’s grubby hands, it was an offer he didn’t understand but couldn’t refuse..

In lieu of being constantly embarrassed and humiliated by his manager Lying Joe ’s  orders to  bench him, Arod agreed to  ride the dog and pony show until next Friday, which  will now become Three Big Events at the Mall on Rivera Avenue..

It wasn’t bad enough Brillo Levine and  his piss boy Lonn Trost were gouging their loyal  sheep / herd mentality  fan base on Saturday  and Sunday with Events, they tacked on a Friday money grab  as well

Yes in deed, let’s  quadruple the ticket price to watch A-Rod, HalYankzeera’s new $27M circus monkey log in 4 AB’s off probably the team he signs with on Saturday, the Tampa Rays…

Everything was working according to Bloody Jean’s plan for 48 hours, until Lying Joe delivered the coup de grâce, posting his line-up  card Tuesday afternoon and the master of ceremonies wasn’t in it??

Rodriguez walked into Fenway Park Tuesday night, manager Joe Girardi’s quote from Sunday still fresh in his ears: “If he wants to play in every game, I’ll find a way.”

“I came to the stadium excited about playing all three games [in Boston],” 

Alex Alex, like you son, Lying Joe hasn’t spoken a true word since, God knows when……

“I’m an emotional guy, and my heart can get tugged at; I think I got caught up in the emotions a little bit,” Girardi said before the game. “I’m human. There’s a human element to me. There’s a human element to Alex. I’m not saying he won’t play these next two days and he won’t be in there, but I’m managing to win the games. And that’s what I have to do.

Yes we’ve seen the emotional Psycho Joe AKA Lying Joe in action.. Usually  when  2 and 2 doesn’t  add up, and the Binder is rendered useless, it gets ugly….

“Surprised, shocking,” A-Rod admitted, asked how he reacted to that conversation. “He has his opinions, I have mine.”

Anyway, if you look hard enough you can find an article on the game itself, which  was 10  times the bummer for the Yanks moving forward then not DHing A-Rod…

Luis Severino had really made some nice strides since his demotion in May, he was overpowering AAA hitters as a starter, and since coming out of the varsity bull pen he’s been  a seek and destroy  weapon…

8.1 innings, 1 run, 1 hit, 3 BB, 10 K’s, 11 Ground balls, 5 Fly Balls

The big night Back to the Rotation, is now back to the drawing board for Little Louie, as an exceptional hitting team, without their best  hitter in the line-up, exposed the  talented, but still not ready  for prime time 22 yr old..

4.1 innings,  7 hits,  5 runs, no BB’s 3K’s, 6 Gb, 11 Fb, 85 pitches

Severino got through the first  8  batters giving up only a single in the 2nd inning, his stuff looked decent, but right off the bat  he didn’t have that skull  and cross bones wrinkle to his slider.

As Cone pointed out, it was moving side to  side, not down and away…When  that’s happening Severino is a Dead Man Walking at this level… A lot of his game is built around an  aggressive attack mode, which becomes empowered when he has his  fast ball  command and an obeying slider building his confidence

 Despite not having his  A stuff, Severino  was moving the needle for 8  batters, until Andy Benintendi, up  from Double A a week  ago, dropped a well hit single to left with  1 out in the 3rd inning…

Betts shook Severino for a standing 8 count, blasting a very loud double off the Monster, that put the tying runs in scoring position

The Midget finished off whatever little confidence Severino had left with a monster 9 pitch AB that  resulted in a text  book  double across traffic plating 2 runs..

It was now obvious Severino had no out pitch on this night, all  that  was left, was a hope he’d be able to  make an adjustment on the fly, but it only got worse

Boston let him off the hook in the 4th, their haste to  expose his weakness resulted in Bradley and Shaw making 2 outs on 5 pitches… Holt got back into  the grinder mentality and it took Severino  7 pitches to  finally punch him out, but it was a whistling past the graveyard inning if I ever saw one….

For all intents and purposes, the game ended in the bottom of the 5th when Boston rudely interrupted Severino’s delusions of grander by pounding him for a lead off triple, and two  run scoring doubles.. Once again Benintendi  and Pedroia with help  from Leon, were the main instigators in ruining Severino’s coming out party

The Red Sox were happy to see recently DFA’d by Boston, Tommy Penny Layne come in the game to  relieve the battered Severino…

Grand Papi who looks like he’d rather be sitting in a lawn chair sipping a pina colada, reminded Layne why he’s now a Yankee and not a Red Sox by slamming a thunderous double off the Monster to  score the Midget making it a done deal  at 5-2…

Somehow Gidrool Central,  Layne, Swarzak  and Shreve managed to pitch  3.2 innings  only allowing  2 hits, and the only run to  score was the Severino inherited run  that Grand Papi  knocked in

The offense per usual was just  about non existent against Porcello  who  could have been had early in this game by even a respectable  hitting team…

With very little fire power in the line-up, Porcello waltzed for  8 innings, on 7 hits, 2 runs, 1 BB, 6 K’s

The Yanks scored first, but not often enough to match what  they  were up  against..

Castro  and Headless doubled in the first  run in the 2nd inning.. Unfortunately they  couldn’t tack on when Sanchez and Hicks wouldn’t comply

Gardner and McCann hooked up  for a double / 2 out single combo in the 3rd to make it 2-0

The Yanks best chance to jump on a tired Porcello came in the 7th.. Headless doubled and was thrown out at  3rd for the 1st out.. A small  dust up  with benches clearing ensued

Hicks was gifted a base on a Shaw error, Gardner doubled in the corner but Espada and Hicks blew getting the run home when Hicks gave up on the play and missed Espada waving him in after Espada had thrown up  the premature stop…. Bad teams do  this on a daily basis, and bad teams making these types of mistakes are a direct reflection of the man in charge, Lying Joe…..

Ellsbury had a chance to  get both  runs home, but per usual he failed miserably…

Boston  tried once again to hand the game to the Yanks when Kimbrel imploded in the 9th walking 4 batters to make the game a 5-3 nail biter..

Humpty Teixeira had a chance to  repay some of the 23.5M he’s robbing this yr but with the bases loaded he was easily punched out by Barnes to  end it

Eovaldi  tries to even it up vs Pomeranz who  the Yanks will  no  doubt make look like Koufax

the Whole 9


Written by Sal

August 10, 2016 at 7:57 am

Posted in Uncategorized

14 Responses

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  1. By the 7th inning i was pissed at myself for still watching this slop.
    I find myself feeling sorry for # 13 ( no not Jim Leyritz)
    Girardi needs a Glasco beat-down like the Pizz
    used to dish out at Shontags,,
    Fuggin hate hate hate that other midget.


    August 10, 2016 at 8:37 am

    • we have to find patience my son, this will be a long and trying road…..I think Lying Joe will get a chance to fuck up the kids, Hal will look at his track record in Miami with the Marlins

      And CashMan will get to see if this prospect haul pans out… These fuckers have gone new school full bore, let’s hope some of these kids can make the leap… We gotta get some hitting talent on this team….


      August 10, 2016 at 9:02 am

  2. This week was supposed to be All Arod All the Time(at least until Friday) but then LyingJoe or Randy Levine pulled the plug. So now instead of seeing Arod play his last 4 Yankee games,we only get 2. Its very important for a team fighting for a pennant(that traded away its 3 best players) to have a chance to win every game(which is why they have to play the scumbag Hicks .192,McCann .231,Tex .197) instead of Arod. Last night was a Hicks Classic,soon to be seen on YES showing all of his athletic skills-he had a baseball trifecta=1-Went 0-3,as usual 2-botched a ball in rf 3-did not score when waved home by our mentally defective 3rd base coach. Susan Waldman in the post game, said “They make a lot of excuses for this guy”. They have to,because HE FUCKING SUCKS. He has pictures of Cashman with underage boys or girls otherwise he would be in Scranton. I am afraid Severino is going to have problems as a starter since he only has 2 pitches. The second time through the order,the problems and hits begin. He needs to develop a 3rd(just like Phil Hughes,Joba and all of their other pitching prospects) pitch to get the batters out. You cannot be a succesful major league starter with only 2 pitches but you can be a very good reliever. Yanks had many chances to win this game-not that it matters-but naturally didn’t. Headley getting thrown out a 3rd for the 1st out(a cardinal sin in baseball),then runners on 2nd & 3rd,of course Ellsbury does nothing,inning over. Yanks had bases loaded in 9th due to walks,Tex strikes out looking. You have to wonder WHAT THE FUCK WAS HE LOOKING FOR? SWING THE BAT!!!!!!!!!! I was glad that the media in the post game gave LyingJoe a hard time about Arod,asking repeated questions why he wasn’t playing. LJ was very uncomfortable,making faces,answering the same bs. We have to enjoy this until Friday,then it will just be watching the team as it battles for a pennant or wild card. Moscone,Brickhouse aka Zelma Zoftig has seemed to be getting larger,the girls too,I was wondering if she was pregnant but they never show her below her chest. Its a lot more fun watching her than the team.


    August 10, 2016 at 11:14 am

    • Hey Big D very entertaining post
      And spot on

      Hicks has now reached Ichiro status for you lol


      August 10, 2016 at 6:49 pm

  3. Severino sent down
    Makes sense right now he’s a reliever


    August 10, 2016 at 6:43 pm

  4. Romine catching
    Sanchez DH’ng
    Can McCant’ s departure be far behind?


    August 10, 2016 at 6:58 pm

    • depends how much money Hal eats, or how good of a prospect they can get back.. For a good prospect the Yanks will eat more money… they ate all of Beltran’s deal or what was left of it to get the prospects they brought back from Texas


      August 10, 2016 at 8:32 pm

  5. Severino needs 15 more days in minors for Yanks to get another year of control. I’m not saying this is the case here but you can throw 20 change ups a game for the varsity just as easy as AAA


    August 10, 2016 at 8:30 pm

  6. hahahaha

    Girardi on Hicks: “You look at the last 10 days, he’s hit a lot of line drives that have been caught. His at-bats have been good….” (1/2)


    August 10, 2016 at 8:36 pm

  7. Judge Frazier and Gamel having good nights.. looks like this guy Enns has some real good stats at AAA, haven’t heard of this kid he’s 25 so he’s long in the tooth for a prospect


    August 10, 2016 at 8:51 pm

  8. Dont hear those boos now, do we ??


    August 10, 2016 at 10:16 pm

  9. Their gidrools suck worse than ours do tonight


    August 10, 2016 at 10:47 pm

  10. “And your children shalll lead you”


    August 10, 2016 at 11:55 pm

  11. I have come to realize that Psycho Joe will be around for a very long time because he is such an excellent ass kisser. Klapisch reports the specifics in today’s article. These are shameful people who have kidnapped the team we loved growing up. They are vindictive, very small and very hard to support.


    August 11, 2016 at 8:15 am

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