Paint The Black

Baseball and Beyond

You Can Leave Your Hat On

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I remember  there was nothing more splendid then  watching Kim Bassinger strip down to Randy Newman’s  You Can Leave Your Hat On in the movie  9 and 1/2 Weeks.

As recently as June 12th we hopefully can remember how splendid  the Bombers were playing as they  carried a 38 and 23 record, 15 games over .500, primed to  wipe out the Angels and A’s on the road, and being touted as MLB’s 2nd best  team behind the Astros..

Aaron Judge  hit a game winning HR in front of his parents, Hell, even Blow Torch Clippard won a game in relief..

There weren’t too many “Tip of the Cap” pressers for Teflon Joe, who  despite his team crashing harder then Charlie Sheen after a week end at the Plaza Hotel, has the most secure job in America..

Yes in lieu of  the Yanks only winning 7 of the 25 games they played from June 13th  until  Aaron Judge Week in Miami, and now losing 3 of the first  5 on the road post  Aaron Judge Week in Miami, Teflon Joe has more job security then a Supreme Court Judge..

As the media, specifically  the YES network, came to his his rescue an announced what propelled the extended losing streak  were a rash of injuries, at least  that  was the excuse… The bull pen imploding had everything to  do  with Aroldis Chapman getting wounded in action, and forced to nurse his $86M Purple Heart on the DL for a month..

The offense lost Holliday, Castro, and Hicks, the starters lost Sabathia,  poor Teflon Joe had more  mash unit patients then “Hawkeye” Pierce, so his mismanaging the Bull Pen,   the line-up, and the game inside the game sequences weren’t an indictment  on his superb managing skills..Just  ask Mike the parrot  Francesa, he’ll repeat “Joe will get a job in 5 minutes”  at least 3 times every hour on the hour..

Anyway the Yanks lost another tough game, this one to  the Twins 4-2, ho hum, what’s another amongst  so many others, and we’re now at  9 and 21 in the last 30 games, no  worries we’ll  get em  tonight…

Teflon Joe was short on relievers again tonight, Tanaka pitching all 8 innings in game 2 on Sunday was irrelevant because it was a second  game but in one  day dummy

Brian Mitchell was thrown in the deep end of the pool to  start this one and he did pretty good, 5 innings, 6 hits, 2 runs, but only 1 earned after he misplayed a throw.. Like most young Bomber pitchers he was at  90 pitches by the 5th inning so he really didn’t give them length, we’ll  get em next time

The Teffy Report

teflon joe

His energetic manager Teflon Joe thought

“ah um his slider was pretty good tonight Teffy told the class in his pre-game report

“if he’s throwing his slider down  and in he’s tough on RHB”…

Who isn’t Teffy?

The manager said they “hit some balls hard right at people but had nothing to  show for it”

I guess that meant the Yanks couldn’t figure out how to drive Frazier in from 2nd base twice?  Red Bull Frazier opened the 6th  and the 8th innings with lead off doubles, but the heart of the order couldn’t drive him home..

Remember when that  was automatic?

GIDP: Romine, Holliday
Yankees RISP: 2-11 (Holliday 0-2, Cooper 1-1, Gregorius 0-1, Romine 1-2, Ellsbury 0-2, Castro 0-2, Judge 0-1)
Team LOB: 7

FWIW, Judge 1 for 21 since Aaron Judge Week in Miami

Holliday was 2-for-19 (.105) since coming back from the DL on Friday. That one hit, however, was a game-tying home run against Craig Kimbrel in the ninth inning Sunday in what turned out to be a 4-1 Yankees win in 16 frames.

Ellsbury was 2-for-10, Didi Gregorius was 4-for-16 and Gardner was 2-for-13.

Last night Ellsbury, Judge, Castro, and Gregorius were 0-13

Teffy 1

When  asked if he had an issue with Gregorius trying to  bunt for a base hit in the 8th with Red Bull Frazier 90  feet away  from grabbing the lead, the sharp  as a tack  field general  said,

“he’s bunting for a base hit, he could have grounded out too, so no I didn’t have a problem with it”

The Yanks were 2 for 11 with RISP so maybe Rogers a lefty was a bit tough on LHB’s and DD was thinking outside the box, next time he’ll  execute a little better, no  worries..

If the Yanks would have executed and taken the lead  Teffy was gonna go  with Adam, he had Adam, and Dellin, Clippard for  little bit, but not much…

“Because we didn’t take the lead” I didn’t use my best pitchers in a tie game…

The last thing Teflon Joe wanted was another extra inning game, can’t blame him, go  bitch to  the schedule maker if you don’t like it, I have a game plan to get to  for tomorrow’s show on YES or is it WPIX?

teffy 2

When asked if he thought the break  had anything to  do  with the lack luster play, he said “yeah the break, guys get out of rhythm, and the only way to get it back in rhythm is to keep playing”

Of course as his team limped to  the finish line in the first half, Teffy said the break is coming at  the right time, we’ll get after it when we get back…

At least he woke up momentarily

Teffy 3

“We only scored 2 runs but we swung the bats a lot better then that  tonight”

Hey it wasn’t all bad

Teffy 4

“Cooper for the first  time didn’t have people bothering him, family calling all hours of the night, making him anxious so he looked better”

Actually Coooop  and the Woodpecker were 5 for 8 with 4 doubles, add in Headley’s double and 5 of the 8 hits were two baggers, but they only scored 2 runs

On the Mitchell error that may have cost the Yanks the game..

“He’s made the play  a million times and he’s not used to playing with Castro  so he has to make the play”

Teffy 5

We did get  a chance to  see Caleb Smith

In Triple-A, Smith, a 14th-round draft pick in 2013, put together an impressive run. In 15 starts, Smith sported an 8-0 record with an ERA of 2.07. That led to Smith to being selected to the Triple-A All-Star Game, which was held last week in Tacoma, Washington.

Following the All-Star Game, Smith received his call-up to the big leagues.

Smitty spent spring training with the Cubs after being acquired by the team in last December’s Rule 5 Draft but they didn’t include him on their 40-man roster and he was returned to the Yankees, he started the 2017 season with the Trenton Thunder in Double-A.

So  a team in desperate need of pitching didn’t put him on the 40 man roster…?

He was dink  and dunked in the 8th inning, but he looks like a pitcher the Yanks should keep throwing out there, but maybe in lower leverage situations, last night he saved the pen from any further abuse  by pitching

3 innings, 4 hits, 2 runs, 1 BB, 5 K’s

His 8th inning went like this

Mauer singled to right.
Sanó singled to left, Mauer to second.
Kepler struck out swinging.
Escobar hit for Vargas.
Escobar singled to left, Mauer scored, Sanó to second, Sanó to third advancing on throw.
Rosario doubled to right, Sanó scored, Escobar to third.
Adrianza intentionally walked.
Castro struck out swinging.
Dozier grounded out to shortstop.

thanks for coming, and thanks for leaving, see you in 10 days, maybe?

teffy 6

It was another Tip  your Cap night in Minnesota, but per Mike Vaccaro all these losses couldn’t be more fun, after all despite Al Yankzeera not admitting they’re throwing in the towel in the wake of the season’s market correction that  started on June 13th, they’re throwing in the towel

It’s time to unload Brett Gardner, the Astros need a left fielder so maybe they can  send the teacher’s pet Houston, he can join McCann  and Beltran in their quest  for a Ring

As Teflon Joe would say The Sun Will Come Up  Tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar

sun comes out tomorrow

Maybe after tonight’s game  Teffy can leave his hat on and not tip  the cap for a change

the Whole 9

the YES men



Written by Sal

July 18, 2017 at 7:57 am

Posted in Uncategorized

19 Responses

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  1. Sal–your report is right on target. It is a team plan without little criticism when you can get the tv guys and the guys who buy ink by the gallon to “talk up” a rebuilding effort for another several years, while they continue to have one of the highest payrolls, continue to rake in the dough and continue to sell everything they can for outrageous sums to the public who buy into all their double speak. If it were 150 years ago, all of them would be selling elixir from the back of a horse drawn wagon.
    Their strategy as they go forward, is to remain somewhat relevant for the second wild card and, in the process, send out the talking heads and writers to promote hope. The cash boxes will be stuffed.
    As far as Psycho Joey Claps goes, I am convinced they will never win again with him at the helm.
    When you watch the rest of baseball, surprisingly ( not really) other teams also hit the ball hard right at fielders, get bad hops, incur questionable umpire calls, and have bullpens that sometimes become overworked. Not in Joey’s world though; it’s only his team.
    Boy, do they ever need an infusion of new blood in the dugout. Mention was made of Molitor last night, whose attitude with the Twins has been a breath of fresh air. Right now the air in the Bronx smells like there’s a month long strike on the part of the sanitation workers.


    July 18, 2017 at 8:30 am

    • hey noogsie we’re on the same page, this sales pitch they keep laying on us is so transparent… And yes Joe has gotten stale, his players had urgency until they won over the media and the fans then it all shut down

      Girardi’s excuses give them a soft landing…. It’s all ok by me but they have to start getting the young players up here, the last thing I want to see is a losing team that has Gardner and Ellsbury blocking Frazier.. One of them has to go

      Headley also has to go, and Andujar should get his feet went and ready to take over third base next yr…

      Adams needs to come up and plunk him in the pen if they don’t think his command is a finished product.. He’s on an innings limit anyway so by August he should be here…

      Unless they have him penciled in as a trade piece over the winter and he’d be more attractive with all of his options intact and his clock not yet started

      Molitor is old school, the Twins are one of the last teams to embrace the analytics, and i bet he doesn’t try to teach a lesson to the media the fans and his players every day

      Girardi constantly talks down to everyone, he needs a quick reminder he’s been here since 08 with a plus $200M payroll and he hasn’t smelled the playoffs in 5 yr’s… Unless we want to count that cameo in 2015

      That team had totally collapsed like this one, only now they have kids they should be playing and vets on bad contracts blocking them

      If Boston can eat Allen Craig, Rusney Castillo, and Fenway Fats money, NY should start to think about doing the same with Headley, Ellsbury, and Gardner… Gardner they should trade and get out from the $13M who cares what they bring back, that money can go toward pitching next yr…


      July 18, 2017 at 8:48 am

  2. Sally Boy,
    All metaphors intact, this was brilliantly conceived from start to finish.
    Kudos on all points

    Enough of the retread whitewall tires
    I wanna see da kids!!

    When the music stops on July 31st
    There better not be chairs for both Gardzilla & the Doughboy. And that still won’t solve the problem, totally, cuz Hicks will be back.
    And based on his play before getting hurt, the guy changed his game, got results, he deserves to play.
    But we need addition by subtraction


    July 18, 2017 at 1:07 pm

  3. Mikey the parrot thinks he’s breaking news saying Yonder Alonso is a guy that the Yanks could look at lol

    The parrot said he watches every game in every sport or don’t apply for this job

    Mikey could sell a park chop to a swami


    July 18, 2017 at 3:21 pm

  4. Sanchez out of the lineup again ??
    Wassup wit # 24 ??


    July 18, 2017 at 4:33 pm

  5. Caleb called up ???? !!!!!


    July 18, 2017 at 4:47 pm

  6. Ok now i see # 24 IS in the lineup,,wonder what changed ??


    July 18, 2017 at 7:23 pm

  7. Colon is supposed to be a punching bag per Al Yankzeera looks like he did the punching in the first inning

    Colon spooked Cessa
    He’s over throwing Lars hope he gets in rhythm

    Tie missed him by a lot
    Trouble now with Cadillac Sano


    July 18, 2017 at 8:26 pm

    • Flash in the pan is adamant about Cessa being out of rhythm with Sanchez
      Not to mention your potential best hitter is a catcher
      They get hurt and have to control a pitching staff tough to do both


      July 18, 2017 at 8:37 pm

  8. Wouldn’t we rather have him concentrating on destroying the baseball
    You can find defensive catchers easier then great hitters


    July 18, 2017 at 8:42 pm

    • This is crazy Bartolo looks like a beer softball player


      July 18, 2017 at 8:45 pm

  9. Bryan Hoch @BryanHoch

    Very important question: will Clint Frazier give No. 30 to David Robertson?

    Man I hope Florial isn’t in this deal
    Mateo is in the line up but Marbles Feinsand thinks he’s gotta be in it

    Kinda sucks losing prospects for a fake playoff run

    Frazier and Choi at first base makes sense Cash needs to thin out his 40 man


    July 18, 2017 at 9:51 pm

  10. I need to medicate heaviky


    July 18, 2017 at 10:16 pm

  11. I need to medicate heavily to be able to listen to these 2 clowns.
    Screamer cryin ruoco is hideous, kissing up to flash the failure,


    July 18, 2017 at 10:19 pm

  12. oel Sherman‏Verified account




    When/if finalzied: #whitesox will be getting 4 players from #Yankees: Rutherford, Clarkin, Clippard and 1 more prospect.


    July 18, 2017 at 11:47 pm

  13. Todd Frazier: .872 OPS in last 41 games. a good jersey boy come on down son…


    July 19, 2017 at 12:13 am

  14. Joel Sherman‏Verified account
    Robertson would cost $11.5M toward luxury tax in ’18 when #Yankees are trying hard to get under threshold


    July 19, 2017 at 12:28 am

  15. D-Rob returns
    Frazier is here now too


    July 19, 2017 at 8:31 am

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